So I’ve been getting generic comment spams on Speed Force today, the kind that look like someone took a bunch of compliments and a thesaurus and stuck them in a salad shooter. I started reading. I started reading this one aloud:
Thank you a lot for providing individuals with remarkably pleasant chance to discover important secrets from this web site. It is often very awesome and full of a lot of fun for me personally and my office co-workers to search the blog at a minimum 3 times in one week to find out the newest items you have got. And lastly, I am just certainly motivated concerning the splendid principles served by you. Some 1 ideas on this page are ultimately the simplest I’ve ever had.
I got about halfway through, and Katie stopped me, saying, “What, you got a comment from Faz?”
I just spent too long troubleshooting a failed file transfer by email. Appropriately enough, it turns out this cartoon is the top search result for “file transfer.”
A series of spam subjects in my junk folder, sorted alphabetically. I can’t help but read them as someone repeatedly trying to get my attention, getting more frantic and frustrated as time goes by.
how are you doing?
how are you getting on?
How Are You Getting Along?
How are you,
HOW ARE YOU.
How Do You Do.
how are you getting along?
HOW DO YOU DO ,
Imagine that a group of people who don’t drive much, don’t understand how cars work under the hood, and have never studied traffic engineering decide that they’re going to stop speeding by requiring that cars automatically slam on the emergency brake and lock the controls the moment they exceed the speed limit — or the moment someone reports that the car has exceeded the speed limit.
Note that I didn’t say anything about turning the engine off, or putting it in neutral. Or only doing so in places where the speed limit is properly posted. Or worrying about whether there’s a car behind them that will have to slam on their own breaks to prevent a pile-up. Or actually checking that the car really is speeding before acting on the report.
Now imagine that criticisms and objections raised by actual drivers, the auto industry, traffic engineers, highway planners, and city planners are all dismissed as speeder propaganda.
That’s basically what’s going on with the “anti-piracy” bills being discussed in the House (SOPA) and Senate (PIPA/Protect IP).
(Posted yesterday on Tumblr)
Here’s another comment spammer whose software plugged in every phrase on its generic comment list instead of picking one at random. Notice how vague these tend to be, so that they could easily apply to almost any post on almost any site.
If you see any of these comments show up on your blog, chances are good that it’s a spammer trying to get a backlink to their shady site, not someone who actually wants to contribute to the conversation.
(Originally cross-posted from LOL Spam)