I call a lot of doctors’ offices, and a lot of them put me on hold. One that I called today had that overly cheerful custom Muzak with embedded recorded messages. The first time I was put on hold, the message said: “Summer. That time of year you dream about on dreary winter days. After we take your call, we suggest you venture outside and take advantage of the wonderful sunny days that abound this time of year.”
Ooookay. I was still puzzling how they thought it was summer now, even in California, when the receptionist took me off hold and then put me back on, and this came twinkling into my ear: “Spring. It’s a time when we turn the clocks ahead and do that proverbial spring cleaning. It’s also a time to say how much we appreciate your patronage.”
Damn, they’ve really turned their clocks ahead.
“Autumn. It’s a seasonal limbo where it’s neither summer nor spring and winter is near. Time to think of other seasons…” Maybe that’s why they didn’t have the current season in there. ;p
Winter. It’s dark and cold, and we encourage you to brighten your days by setting fire by setting your enemies afire.
Okay, that was weird. Only one by setting.
When I get really lame or out dated on-hold recordings, I always am picturing a Max Headroom type robot-operator who’s head is rotating 320 degrees all the way around – but slowly, while they are talking.