Now there’s someone who has their priorities lined up. You can tell they’ve got a deep understanding of the true meaning of the holiday. Forget all that Mexican military victory stuff—it’s all about getting drunk on tequila and cervezas.

Actually, now that I think about it, that probably is more or less how most Americans celebrate May 5. The northeast has St. Patrick’s Day. The southwest has Cinco de Mayo. Suddenly, the similarities between the Irish and Mexican flags have taken on an entirely new significance.

As for this event, I think I would’ve gone with "Drinko de Mayo." It fits the original phrasing better. But as Katie pointed out, that sounds too much like drinking mayonnaise—not something that’s going to bring in too many customers.