Dial 1010-1999-2000....
Culled from the residents of Arroyo Vista House 1010 during the 1999-2000 school year. Sad to say, we couldn't find dates for most of these quotes, so I suppose they're condemned to a lifetime of Friday nights sitting at home watching TV by themselves.
- A bitched-at pot never boils.
- Alex
- If you already don't think you're perfect, you might as well play Scrabble.
- Alex
- If you can spell 'blow-job,' I'll give it to you.
- Alex
- You make me unreasonable.
- Alex
- Not only did she get the piles, she got double taxes.
- Alex
- You haven't experienced life until you have experienced Gary.
- Alex
- Destroyer of panties?
- Alex
- Is there anything wrong with fucking everything?
- Alex
- What is it with you and ass demons from other countries? ...international ass demons.
- Angela
- There's 1.5 people in China.
- Angela
- A really weird heart... a heart with fur.
- Angela
- ...That's your little nitrogen-fixating nodule. Just in case you become a plant.
- Angela
- "I should be a porn star."
"No, you shouldn't. - Angela, Alex
- "I'm going with cockroaches."
"Where are you going with cockroaches?"
"Trust me, you don't wanna know. - Angela, Katie
- You, plus sign, me, equals sign, us.
- Anonymous
- Grrrrrr...
- Chinako
- I like to pull things out of my butt.
- Chinako
- Ooh! You're watching the deep frying channel!
- Emily (4-year 1010 resident and Gary's gf)
- So, George Washington is Satan.
- Gary
- There's only one quote from me on the quote board!
- Gary
- Patrick, you seem to have forgotten that you're doing my midterm.
- Gary
- Stop grabbing Alex's ass.
- Gary
- Real life is just a forum for video games.
- Gary
- You improve the lives of the people, you improve the lives of their pets, that's what I've always said. Trickle-down pet-economics.
- Gary
- I don't feel sorry for the cows.
- Heidi
- You belittle my rice?
- Jason
- ...Free-floating gender anxiety?
- Jason
- Matt has a head-shaped elbow.
- Jason
- Kelson's drink keeps following me around.
- Jason
- Look, I'm sorry I made you have a transaction.
- Jason
- I just wanted to know if he was having a sulfurous day.
- Jason
- Don't make me kick you in the rice cracker.
- Jason
- Holy wholly moldy walla walla water... cannon. What??
- Jason
- "The wild spitting henna cone."
"Which travels with the wild spotted paper towel shred. And the black-tailed toothpick." - Jason, Katie, 2000-01-14
- 'Jack & Jill' were up the creek / without a freakin' paddle. / The W.B. couldn't see / the viewers were not cattle.
- Jason and Katie
- If I had the coconuts, I'd do the Monty Python thing.
- Joanie
- You don't like that I scream 'penis'??
- Joanie
- We should form a search party and go look for her with a tooth.
- Joanie
- North Dakota is international waters?
- Josh
- He has glasses on; you can't trust a guy with glasses.
- Josh
- I'm pissed off that I'm in a bad mood.
- Josh
- You don't go to Denny's to eat, you dumbass.
- Josh
- Floccinaucinihilipilification is a floccinaucinihilipilificatious word.
- Josh
- I'm not dashing.
- Josh
- Buy smaller gallons.
- Josh
- So if you spread espresso on your toast, your car will blow up.
- Josh
- Stop twisting my words the right way.
- Josh
- Shoot me \-\- with chairs?
- Josh
- You can't have pure water. It dissolves in itself.
- Josh
- His ass is less Asian than Nathan's.
- Josh
- It's a lead pipe, just made out of plastic.
- Josh
- They're prospective students. Floor's too good for them. I say hang them from the ceiling by their feet.
- Josh & Nathan
- So, she got a nuclear missile up her ass??"
"Yes. - Josh, Gary
- "I could be a jerk."
"Understatement of the decade. It's still young, but I think that'll hold up." - Josh, Nathan
- You trim my beard, I trim your pants.
- Josh to Merissa
- We'll go to the f***in' Ritz and buy every f***in' person at UCI a f***in' side dish.
- Justin
- Mariah, put it away!
- Justin
- I want to do things with the gymnastics bar.
- Justin
- Parents and green slime don't mix.
- Katie, 2000-01-14
- I am not a henna masseuse.
- Katie, 2000-01-14
- You don't get run over by banana peels.
- Katie, 2000-01-14
- Satan shouldn't sing in musicals.
- Katie
- Don't throw cats at me with your head!
- Katie
- Yes! It's *fuzzy*!
- Katie
- I have a naked ear. And the other is in a metal bikini.
- Katie
- I'm really afraid of the long-term commitment of $20 worth of leather.
- Katie
- I'm not gonna drool on your bunny.
- Katie
- I don't think Trent would approve of my rolling system.
- Katie
- I need my weekly gato.
- Katie
- Don't get caught in my barcode?
- Katie
- "Sit, Ubu, sit."
"Good mango."
"Arf!" - Katie, Jason
- Mmm.... Unicorn slobber. It's the best.
- Katie, Jason
- You're lucky that Katie isn't here with her notepad to put that in the quote book.
- Lawrence
- I've never actually been in the Engineering Tower when it was on fire.
- Lawrence
- Haven't you ever seen a keychain hanging from a fire alarm before?
- Lawrence
- It just wouldn't be a CHP retreat without 'Amish Paradise'.
- Lawrence
- So if you're talking counties... logically, Needles is the same distance from La Palma as ? is.
- Lawrence
- "So you're saying, 'I am appalled at your lack of fill in the blank'?"
"Exactly." - Lorrel, Josh
- They are so thin that they wouldn't be fat if they got pregnant and ate a cow.
- Merissa
- She gives me bits at night.
- Merissa
- I am a gerbil.
- Matt
- I'm going to rat-fuck you, Justin.
- Matt
- Josh, do you want to have a baby?
- Merissa
- Don't force me to start absolving sin.
- Nathan
- Oh no. That's worse than stealing a VCR and finding out it's Beta.
- Nathan
- I don't want to have to sell my soul to Stacy again.
- Nathan
- Just because I have occasional flashbacks doesn't mean I was there.
- Nathan
- I'm addicted to breathing. I do it all the time! I do it in front of my parents!!
- Nathan
- I'm making your nonsequitur a sequitur.
- Nathan
- Sleep is just a substitute for caffeine.
- Nathan
- Normally, I'm sentient.
- Nathan
- Who wants to be the Democratic Party candidate? ...exclusively on FOX.
- Patrick
- I just don't think PINK is my color.
- Patrick
- You smell like Christmas!
- Reena
- It looks like an eel!
- Reena
- I like to steal things from bathrooms.
- Reena
- Your name needs to not be Meadow!
- Reena
- My name is Amit. Not Amita's sister.
- Reena
- I love my backhand.
- Reena
- Who are you gonna believe, me or Devil Boy?
- Reena
- R: "...and what liquor does to most people, you know, talkativeness \-\- Chem is liquor to Patrick."
K: "Apparently, Patrick is your liquor."
R: "Yes, he is my liquor."
(assorted laughter)
R: "No, wait. He is not my licker. He is my alcohol." - Reena, Kelson
- There is no 'I' in 'team', but there is a 'me.'
- Ryan
- My topic would be recreational gynecology.
- Ryan
- It isn't an orgy, per se, because there wasn't a goat.
- Ryan
- Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr...
