A Vast Quantity of the Bizarre and Unknown
Culled from the residents of Arroyo Vista House 1010 during the 1998-1999 school year.
Fall 1998
- It's a National Geographic Special: Stalking the Wild Conversation, with Katie Foreman.
- Gary, 26-Oct-1998
- I might as well get something accomplished while I'm not sleeping.
- Alex, 24-Oct-1998
- It would really suck to be a vampire because you'd always have to get invited in to go to the bathroom.
- Brian, 23-Oct-1998
- I think Jason's flashing you again.
- Jenny, 10/?/98
- Real men do it with their eyes open.
- Alex, 26-Oct-1998
- The punk rock kids, the punk rock kids...
- Kristen, 25-Oct-1998
- But that's not the worst part of my job...
- Kristen, 25-Oct-1998
- Midterms on good luck?
- Kelson, 26-Oct-1998
- Witness the thing that has chicken in it!
- Angela, 26-Oct-1998
- Lockers don't kill people. People kill people.
- Alex, 16-Oct-1998
- Ah, couscous ripening under a fluorescent light.
- Brian, 27-Oct-1998
- There is the other side of here
- Brian, date unknown
- Would you like some fruit?
- Jenny, frequently
- You can't really choose the nationality of your roommate.
- Jenny, 1-Nov-1998
- I've never survived a Kaba shooting before.
- Katie, 2-Nov-1998
- I actually fell asleep on that anteater.
- Katie, 2-Nov-1998
- Now why would someone want to coat a hair with cyanide?
- Kelson, 16-Nov-1998
- I still have to pull Madrigal Dinner out of my ass.
- Katie, 17-Nov-1998
- When was the last time you exercised [sic] your demons?
- Brian, 18-Nov-1998
- Have you been sniffing chives again?
- Anne, 21-Nov-1998
- The Flaming Backhoe Bed LauncherTM.
- Alex, 6-Dec-1998 (wait, what?)
- There's so many levels of sex in that one I can't take it.
- Alex, 6-Dec-1998
- "Holy shit, Scatman!"
- Brian, 6-Dec-1998
- It's half past cheesecake.
- Brian, 6-Dec-1998
- Beware of the warmification of pasta servers.
- Kelson, 7-Dec-1998
- Yeah, but the garbanzo beans aren't going to light themselves on fire.
- Kelson, 20-Dec-1998
- I have a camera in my backpack, but you'd have to be shooting through my head.
- Kelson, 20-Dec-1998
- Which one of us is invisible? It's gotta be me, because I can see all of you.
- Alex, 22-Dec-1998
Winter 1999
- "I like my hearing. It's my only good sense."
"I don't have any good sense..." - Brian & Angela, 2-Jan-1999
- But I love choking my arm.
- Katie, 7-Jan-1999
- You're wearing his sock in your hair?
- Angie, 11-Jan-1999
- Well, Merissa, I gotta go, because. . . you're sitting right next to me and I feel stupid.
- Po (on the phone), 20-Jan-1999
- I can be gay and not be gay.
- Atul, 20-Jan-1999
- Brian, you are very observant. You're frightening me.
- Merissa, 20-Jan-1999
- No, there is nothing walking around in the sink.
- Katie, 20-Jan-1999
- You'd be ugly too if you had people lying on you off and on for years.
- Brian (in reference to 1010 couch), 3-Feb-1999
- It's fun, though! It separates myself from... my other self.
- Po, 9-Feb-1999
- Here, let me hit you with my old lab.
- Jenny, 15-Feb-1999
- Come on, guys - I just hit my head on the floor, give me a break!
- Angela, 16-Feb-1999
- He's a hunka hunka burnin' Gary.
- Angie, 23-Feb-1999
- The Psycho Sloppy Slacker ChickTM
- Angela, 24-Feb-1999
- That decade when the third digit started with an 8.
- Kelson, 26-Feb-1999
- There's no such thing as Crispy Tetris.
- Katie, 1-Mar-1999
- Jenny stole my bowling fairies!
- Emily, 6-Mar-1999
- We went to France and the best part of it was going to Italy.
- Alex, 9-Mar-1999
- That's like a sugar cube of salt!
- Kelson, 15-Mar-1999
Spring 1999
- I don't know if I can eat it, but I know I want... Britain.
- Angela, 31-Mar-1999
- You wouldn't really want to rape broccoli.
- Katie, 5-Apr-1999
- That's right, a lemon-flavored rodent. Mmm-mmm.
- Brian, 5-Apr-1999
- It's an inn! The out is out on In-N-Out!
- Katie, 8-Apr-1999
- I've heard of that before, but I've never seen it.
- Stayover student, 8-Apr-1999
- "There's a lot of things you shouldn't do with broccoli."
"Like make Jell-O?" - Katie and Anne, 13-Apr-1999
- The 1010 Twister Tourney. Bare-ass naked.
- Alex, 15-Apr-1999
- Insert Tab A into... holy crud!
- Kelson, 16-Apr-1999
- Yay! Anastasia! With Miracle Grow-Hair Woman!
- Emily, 16-Apr-1999
- How do you get "high?"
- Merissa, 21-Apr-1999
- I want a satanic picture of Angela!
- Angie, 21-Apr-1999
- That would require me remembering the future.
- Kelson, 26-Apr-1999
- Brooke, pick my nose or something.
- Matt, 3-May-1999
- I'm really pissed at the media here. I can't even warp myself properly.
- Alex, 3-May-1999
- Now I feel like staring at the hamster.
- Anne, 5-May-1999
- I don't get much sfatisaction [sic] from blowing my nose.
- Katie, 8-May-1999
- Hey, this thing has molecules in it!
- Emily, 6-May-1999
- I will not sink to bologna.
- Katie, 10-May-1999
- It's nine o'clock. What's the fucking for?
- Alex, 12-May-1999
- I'd like a hamburger . . . . hold the goat.
- Brian, 12-May-1999
- The lawnmowers are running for their lives!
- Alex, 12-May-1999
- I guess I'm agnostic about Eitan.
- Alex, 12-May-1999
- "So when did you start believing in Eitan?"
"Oh, I guess when he came by and whacked me on the head."
"What did he whack you on the head with?"
"Wouldn't you like to know?" - Eitan, Brian, and Angela, 12-May-1999
- "We're talking about musicals."
"We're talking about buggering." - Gary & Emily, 16-May-1999
- Oh my God, it's the sacred symbol of Magumbah! Or something like that.
- Kelson, 16-May-1999
- "The grocery store, the grocery store..."
"When it comes to fun, nothing is more
Than going down to
The grocery store." - Angela & Alex, 19-May-1999
- A whole duckful?
- Alex, 23-May-1999
- Can't go wrong with the undead, that's what I always say.
- Gary, 24-May-1999
- I need to wash the cheese out of my nails... that's a weird thing to say.
- Katie, 24-May-1999
- Now with more phallic-y goodness.
- Gary, 24-May-1999
- So can I go raid 1006 for my pot now?
- Katie, 28-May-1999
- Is that a lightsaber in your pocket, or...
- Katie, 28-May-1999
- No, "apparelfixated" does not work!
- Katie, 28-May-1999
- "You're not a resident!"
"But he had SEX on the Scrabble board!" - Kelson & Alex, re: Eitan, 28-May-1999
- I want to see you naked, Brian.
- Alex, 28-May-1999
- "Katie's here to save us!"
"From what?"
"My lack of CHP-ness." - Angela, Katie, and Anne, 16-Jun-1999
Continue to the 1999-2000 school year...
Notes
The Flaming What?
A group of us were hanging out and talking about random stuff, including the game of appending "in bed" to the end of fortune cookie messages. (Consider something like "You will travel far and meet interesting people... in bed.") Earlier in the conversation, Alex had explained how he and some of his friends would use the phrase "I dig that with a massive backhoe." At one point he also said, "Things are always more interesting when you set them on fire."
Inevitably, we managed to put all three phrases together:
"I dig that with a massive backhoe."
"In bed."
"And set it on fire."
"The Flaming Backhoe Bed LauncherTM!"
Eating Britain
Alex and Angela had baked a cake and decorated it with plastic World War II soldiers and flags, placing each nation in a different corner of the cake.
Picky
Brooke was standing behind Matt with her arms poking through his, doing the "I have four arms" routine. 'Nuff said.